When I saw this posted on FaceBook the title caught my attention right a way. So I read it and was so moved by it I had to re-post. What moved me the most isn't that my dad is a right-wing asshole... it's because I have viewed my dad as just a plain asshole for most of my life. What moved me was the response. I hope it moves you to a different place... it has for me.

Ask Andrew W.K.: My Dad Is a Right-Wing Asshole
By Andrew W.K. Wed., Aug. 6 2014 
Ask Andrew W.K.

[Editor's note: Every Wednesday New York City's own Andrew W.K. takes your life questions, and sets you safely down the right path to a solution, a purpose or -- no surprise here -- a party. Need his help? Just ask: AskAWK@villagevoice.com]

Hi Andrew,

I'm writing because I just can't deal with my father anymore. He's a 65-year-old super right-wing conservative who has basically turned into a total asshole intent on ruining our relationship and our planet with his politics. I'm more or less a liberal democrat with very progressive values and I know that people like my dad are going to destroy us all. I don't have any good times with him anymore. All we do is argue. When I try to spend time with him without talking politics or discussing any current events, there's still an underlying tension that makes it really uncomfortable. Don't get me wrong, I love him no matter what, but how do I explain to him that his politics are turning him into a monster, destroying the environment, and pushing away the people who care about him?

Thanks for your help,
Son of A Right-Winger


Dear Son of A Right-Winger,

Go back and read the opening sentences of your letter. Read them again. Then read the rest of your letter. Then read it again. Try to find a single instance where you referred to your dad as a human being, a person, or a man. There isn't one. You've reduced your father -- the person who created you -- to a set of beliefs and political views and how it relates to you. And you don't consider your dad a person of his own standing -- he's just "your dad." You've also reduced yourself to a set of opposing views, and reduced your relationship with him to a fight between the two. The humanity has been reduced to nothingness and all that's left in its place is an argument that can never really be won. And even if one side did win, it probably wouldn't satisfy the deeper desire to be in a state of inflamed passionate conflict.

The world isn't being destroyed by democrats or republicans, red or blue, liberal or conservative, religious or atheist -- the world is being destroyed by one side believing the other side is destroying the world. The world is being hurt and damaged by one group of people believing they're truly better people than the others who think differently. The world officially ends when we let our beliefs conquer love. We must not let this happen.

When we lump people into groups, quickly label them, and assume we know everything about them and their life based on a perceived world view, how they look, where they come from, etc., we are not behaving as full human beings. When we truly believe that some people are monsters, that they fundamentally are less human than we are, and that they deserve to have less than we do, we ourselves become the monsters. When we allow our emotions to be hypnotized by the excitement of petty bickering about seemingly important topics, we drift further and further away from the fragile and crucial human bond holding everything together. When we anticipate with ferocious glee the next chance we have to prove someone "wrong" and ourselves "right," all the while disregarding the vast complexity of almost every subject -- not to mention the universe as a whole -- we are reducing the beauty and magic of life to a "side" or a "type," or worst of all, an "answer." This is the power of politics at it's most sinister.

At its best, politics is able to organize extremely complex world views into manageable and communicable systems so they can be grappled with and studied abstractly. But even the most noble efforts to organize the world are essentially futile. The best we can usually achieve is a crude and messy map of life from one particular vantage point, featuring a few grids, bullet points, and sketches of its various aspects and landmarks. Anything as infinitely complex as life, reality, and the human experience can never be summed up or organized in a definitive system, especially one based on "left or right," "A or B," "us or them." This is the fatal flaw of binary thinking in general. However, this flaw isn't just ignored, it's also embraced, amplified, and deliberately used as a weapon on the very people who think it's benefiting their way of thinking.

Human beings crave order and simplicity. We cling to the hope that some day, if we really refine our world view and beliefs, we can actually find the fully correct way to think -- the absolute truth and final side to stand on. People and systems craving power take advantage of this desire and pit us against each other using a "this or that" mentality. The point is to create unrest, disagreement, resentment, and anger -- a population constantly at war with itself, each side deeply believing that the other is not just wrong, but also a sincere threat to their very way of life and survival. This creates constant anxiety and distraction -- the perfect conditions for oppression. The goal of this sort of politics is to keep people held down and mesmerized by a persistent parade of seemingly life-or-death debates, each one worth all of our emotional energy and primal passion.

But the truth is, the world has always been and always will be on the brink of destruction. And what keeps it from actually imploding is our love for life and our deep-seeded desire not to die. Our love for our own life is inextricably connected to our love of all life and the miracle of this phenomenon we call "the world." We must give all of ourselves credit every day for keeping things going. It's an incredible achievement to exist at all.

So we must protect and respect each other, no matter how hard it feels. No matter how wrong someone else may seem to us, they are still human. No matter how bad someone may appear, they are truly no worse than us. Our beliefs and behavior don't make us fundamentally better than others, no matter how satisfying it is to believe otherwise. We must be tireless in our efforts to see things from the point of view we most disagree with. We must make endless efforts to try and understand the people we least relate to. And we must at all times force ourselves to love the people we dislike the most. Not because it's nice or because they deserve it, but because our own sanity and survival depends on it. And if we do find ourselves pushed into a corner where we must kill others in order to survive, we must fully accept that we are killing people just as fully human as ourselves, and not some evil abstract creatures.

Love your dad because he's your father, because he made you, because he thinks for himself, and most of all because he is a person. Have the strength to doubt and question what you believe as easily as you're so quick to doubt his beliefs. Live with a truly open mind -- the kind of open mind that even questions the idea of an open mind. Don't feel the need to always pick a side. And if you do pick a side, pick the side of love. It remains our only real hope for survival and has more power to save us than any other belief we could ever cling to.

Your friend,
Andrew W.K.

Which Rock?

Aug. 24, 2014                                                                                                    

Acts 5:17-29, Matt 16:13-20

I gave this sermon at Trinity Lutheran Church, Clawson, Mi. as part of facilitating a Core Values process with them. As a trained Transition Pastor I help congregations make pastoral & ministry transitions, and help them peer into the future. 

There is a story of a pastor standing at the back of the church in a receiving line after his first worship service. Everyone was telling him what a 'nice' sermon it was, when a strange-looking guy came through the line, grabbed his hand, and said, 'Pastor, that was the worst sermon I ever heard.'

The pastor was a little surprised, but went right on shaking hands. A few minutes later the same guy came through the line again. This time he said, 'That sermon had nothing to do with the text.'

Later, this same fellow showed up a third time: 'Pastor,' he said, 'If all your sermons are as boring as that one, I'm never coming back here again.'

At that point, a considerate member of the congregation drew the pastor aside and said, 'Don't worry about him. He's just a little crazy. He’s just repeating what everyone else saying.'
--As retold by James A. Harnish, First Things First, 14 June 1992, Tampa, Florida.

Prayer

Imagine you’re walking along side of Jesus…You’ve been chatting about the people that have been healed in the town you just left. You’re amazed… your excited.. the adrenalin is flowing… you and your buddies are high 5ing each other… it’s been a great day. Then Jesus looks you square in the eye and says, “Who do you say I am?”

The question stops you dead ion your tracks… you look at Jesus… Jesus is looking at you… “Who do you say I am?” And you’re stuck… How do you respond?

Does this question strike the fear of God in you?

            Who do you say I am?... Jesus is asking…

That is the question this week… perhaps it’s the question of a lifetime. 

It’s the question we all must answer at some point in our lives. 

It’s a question on what you believe… on what you stand up for.

It’s a question on what’s most important in your life.

It’s a question on what you value.

The question Jesus is asking is not a request for a mere confession or intellectual assent, but do I dare say, a response of acclamation!

 A statement of belief...

A statement of how we live our faith & life.

The past few weeks of the news cycle have been quite crazy…There has and continues to be the mass killing of Christians in Iraq... The suicide of Robin Williams…The shooting of Michael Brown… The terrible flooding in our area… While stuff like this happens all the time around the world… periodically these things get highlighted… bringing us an up close and personal view of life & death and destruction. 

While these events are not related… there is a connection that is real because at the end of the day… there is a response. We need an answer. We are looking for a response to all that is happening. We are looking for understanding and reasons why things happen. Jesus is seeking a response as well.

Our Bible stories today in Matt & Acts are bookends to how Jesus believes we should respond. Jesus’ friends are grappling with how to answer Jesus. The following might be going through their heads. 

        Do we tell him what he wants to hear?

        Do we give the safe answer… John the Baptist, Elijah, Jeremiah…?

        Do we not answer?

Peter of course answers… perhaps for all of them and perhaps a bit hesitantly… “You’re the Messiah, the Son of the Living God.” A few verses later Jesus is accosting Peter when he says, "Get behind me Satan." You can visualize the rest of them all nodding in agreement. I believe it’s safe to say… we’d all be doing the same thing. Nodding our heads. This doesn't really get us to where Jesus wants us… does it?

Acts 5 get’s us to the other end. It’s what happens when we respond in the way of faith. You see… Jesus’ friends have made the bold response about who Jesus is and are responding by sharing the story of Jesus with others. Folks… they’re sharing the good news… they are sharing who Jesus is. It’s a value… guiding principle… an important part of what it means to be a person of faith… a Christian! As a result… they find themselves in jail. As a result… it doesn’t stop them… they continue to share Jesus. As a result… it was a risk… at the end of the day… it was about obeying God rather than people. 

Again... Jesus is asking… Who do you say I am? It’s a question of extraordinary vulnerability. The Christians in Iraq are answering… and some are dying. What about you…? Are you responding? Jesus is asking… what will I/we wager our lives? It’s risky… we might be ridiculed… resented… preyed on… even jailed. Really.... which rock do we place our life…Ourselves or Jesus? 

In part… not only is Jesus asking who he is… we have to ask who we are… and after worship we will gather for conversation about what our values you really believe as a faith community. What values you will stake your life as Trinity Lutheran. The values of how you will respond in faith to a community of need. And Values that help you answer Jesus, Who do you say I am?

Dietrich Bonhoeffer, in his book “The Cost of Discipleship  says, “The new situation must be created, in which it is possible to believe in Jesus as God incarnate; that is the impossible situation in which everything is staked solely on the word of Jesus. Peter had to leave the ship to risk his life on the sea, in order to learn both his own weakness and the almighty power of the Lord. If Peter had not taken the risk, he would never have learned the meaning of faith. Before he can believe, the utterly impossible situation on the seas must be displayed. The road to faith passes through obedience to the call of Jesus. Unless a definite step is demanded, the call vanishes into thin air, and if men imagine they can follow Jesus without taking this step, they are deluding themselves like fanatics.” (The Cost of Discipleship, 68.) 

How do you answer Jesus? Who do you say I am?

A Challenge to Millennial's

I found this interesting blog article on thespiritporch.blogspot.com from a millennial as a challenge to millennial's. But it got me thinking about how we boomers and older generations view the myth's around them. Perhaps... there's a way to bridge the challenges on all sides of the generational divide. No matter where you find yourself, perhaps, we can all learn something from each other.


a challenge to millennial's from a millennial
Here are some common perceptions about Millenials, their money, and their relationship to the church, followed by what I believe to be the kernel of truth in each and then a challenge to other Millenials (I’m one of them) who are trying to live faithfully in uncertain times.


1. The church is guilty until proven innocent.

Truth - Every thinking adult 18-118 can recite several scandals and atrocities that have chained themselves to the public image of the church. But where older generations might be able to juxtapose a positive image of their childhood church or a pastor that they remember well, Millenials generally aren’t. Or if they’re lucky enough to at least have that (as I do) it is regularly humiliated by the majority opinion of their peer group.

Challenge – As a generation, we pride ourselves on our ability to keep a conscious check on our biases. But how many of us are paying attention to all the clergy collars anywhere there is a peace protest or a rally for equality? How many of us are thinking of Dorothy Day, Dietrich Bonhoeffer, Oscar Romero, Desmond Tutu, or Martin Luther King Jr. when we level our critiques of the church? I’m not saying we have to turn a blind eye to the church when it screws up as our grandparents might have been guilty of doing from time to time. Just be fair. And at least recognize the good with the bad.


2. The Church is not a Millennial’s primary clan

Truth - President Obama was wise to promote his health care law on “Between Two Ferns” with Zach Galifianakis not because it shares any deep resonance with his overall message but because the sardonic irony of its presentation is code for a deeper rooted cultural awareness. The intended message was clear: “You can trust me. I’m one of you.” The church has no such social cachet. The churches meeting in some hipster bar or coffee coop might be short term draw for a few, but they’re no Regina Spektor.

Challenge - If you want to follow Jesus but need a community more rooted than “pub theology” and not backward like fundamentalist Christianity, and you don’t believe that your down-to-earth neighborhood church gets you, your worldview, or your cultural mindset; then change it. Millenials are certainly too enlightened to be ageist, no? So give Beverly and Ethel some credit. As a pastor of multiple generations, you’d be amazed how many Beverly and Ethel’s I’ve met who, it turns out, were yearning for the words I had to say when, previously, I might have assumed that I was far too radical for them. Repeatedly, I’ve been all hopped up on my “radical Gospel” only to discover Beverly’s who are on the no fly list for protesting The School of the Americas in the eighties and Ethel’s who have spent decades teaching school for almost no compensation in Mali and Columbia. Lesson learned: I’m not that radical. But I can be, if I get some skin in the game and maybe even humble myself to learn from these people.


3. Millenials don’t want to pay a mortgage and electrical bills for a church when they could be giving directly to a cause that they care about

Truth - Fair enough.

Challenge - This is not an either/or, and most of us give so little to the “causes” that we say we care about, it would be laughable to claim that it is. Beyond that, how many Millenials realize that Lutheran Services in America is the single biggest charitable organization in America in terms of revenue? Last fall, at the drop of a hat, my congregation raised $45,000 to bring 29 families out of extreme poverty in the central plateau. A crowd-funding internet campaign would have required ten or twenty times as many participants to generate that kind of investment. Why was this possible? Because we had been paying electric bills and a mortgage so that we could gather week after week as a community, hear stories, and develop a common vision around a God whose heart is always first and foremost with the poor and who suffers no either/or-s when it comes to their sake.


4. Millennial's have no money

Truth - Millenials have no money, mostly.

Challenge - Giving money away faithfully doesn’t require a steady income and sure handle on the future. In fact, the word faithfullyimplies just the opposite. And no one is asking you to compete with the empty nesters in the fourth pew whose house is paid off, and their one child got a full ride to Yale, and now they’re left with nothing but disposable income. A leap of faith for you might be $5 more per week out of your scarcity where another $100 to them is nothing. The church is the only institution in our society that deals with money whose president and CEO (forgive the language, Jesus) actually gets more excited about the $5 than the $100 (Mark 12:41-44).


5. Millennial's are anxious about the future

Truth – Delayed careers, student loan debt, housing crash; the whole bit.

Challenge - It’s commonplace in our society for us to entrust our future to our money. The theological term for that in which you place your future well-being is a “god.” This nation may have spent centuries going to church on Sunday, but when it came down to the serious business of actually surviving, Christ has never seriously competed with our everyday financial planner for the position of high priest. But money is a particularly unforgiving god whose mercy never overrules his cold, calculating logic He will repossess your stuff and evict you cold and naked the second you anger him. So Jesus’ challenge to people with money anxieties was both counter-intuitive and elegantly logical, get rid of it. Putting money into the plate is an act of defiance against that copper god. In some sense, we’re literally getting rid of him in hopes of discovering a God who is far more gracious.

- Pastor Jared